It has been said so many times that it has become a cliché way to begin the writing of letters, uttering of monologues, the opening scenes of romantic comedies, and a dozen other conceptions of emotional expression. But I’ll say it anyway... because it works for me, too...
Some people spend their entire lives waiting.
They wait for the light to turn green, they wait in line at the grocery store, they wait for the package in the mail, they wait for their lottery ticket to be a winner. They wait for school to be over so they can wait for the perfect job opportunity so they can wait to meet Mr./Mrs. Right so they can wait to get married and then wait for a child, and then wait for a house, and then wait to die. All this god damn waiting and no appreciation for all that goes on in between.
In a somewhat shameful way, I will raise my hand along with the others admitting to falling guilty of playing the waiting game...
...but it has been over the past few years that I’ve discovered how much more exciting the "in between"s are than what it is I’m actually waiting for.
While waiting to graduate, while waiting for "Mr. Right", while waiting for work to feel fulfilling... I escaped somewhere that made me forget about all those things... and I made the most incredible memories I’ll ever know.
I let myself go, released myself of the pressures and binds of the things we, as young people, are expected to wait for. I put my hand down and pulled out my big red, pentagonal "STOP" sign and all those judgmental fingers came to a screeching halt. I'll get my sleep next week, but this weekend I'll sacrifice it. I made it clear and relevant to myself and to anyone who dare question my motives, that if not for keeping myself happy and sane, I will able to achieve a fulfilling life.
I know I’ve said this a hundred times before, but I can’t stress enough how much the fact that while everything around me changed and flew by in different directions, it was the few and far away that always remained the same. The constants; the people who know without words, and laugh without reason. The people who have stopped waiting and started to smile with not just their mouth, but with every ounce of brightness that they've had the ability to conjure up by NOT waiting.
And I stress how much you need to know this because I was in a miserable place before I went down that path... that yellow brick road. I was a person I’m not exactly proud to admit to; those people I've met over the years have brought out amazing pieces of me. I’m proud to be someone who isn’t always waiting, and someone who gets in trouble for making last minute decisions because I just can’t wait.
But we move... we move in, we move out, we move others and are moved by others. Watching those constants move on is inevitable and a piece of me knows deep down that my life, from then on out, will never be the same without them. I’m torn… but I’m happy. I’m excited for them because I know that it is all a product of not waiting. I can only hope that during this experience we are all able to meet people that will change your life and your state of mind in as positive a way as they are able to change mine.
